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Sarah's Writing: Chapter Three
Posting so everyone can have input and see the changes between the initial writing and the final product! The Gang Lands on the Spitfire Islands Opening image: the Bright passage on the open water. It's almost dark, the sun just hanging on the horizon. Zoom to show Maude bent over the side of the ship, obviously vomiting. Deimos approaches and slaps her jovially on the back. "How ya doin, doc?" She grimaces. "You’d think three weeks at sea would be plenty of time to get used to the rocking, right?" He laughs. "You'll get there eventually, kid. Being stuck in the sick bay day and night probably doesn't help much. Don't you have a potion or salve or something for seasickness?" She has her head on her elbows. "I do. They don't help. At all." Miri watches the two of them from across the deck. She's standing with a group of three passengers, beside a human man in elegant clothing. Man: "Andrina and I will be busy once we land. Imports have been increasing steadily and I'm hoping to make new connections." Dwarf man: "Excellent! My son-in-law owns a profitable ship-building enterprise, and if you're looking to invest, might I recommend…" Miri's interest is clearly wandering as she looks around the deck. The captain is giving orders to a gaunt, dark-haired man (MA), Deimos is still talking to Maude, and sailors are either heading below or climbing the rigging. "And you, Miss Saa'Miri? Will you be joining us?" She's startled by the question. "Uhh…sorry?" she asks. "Will you be joining us for dinner? Surely a young lady like yourself would be interested in making some favorable connections before we land!" She smiles uncomfortably. "Ah… thank you, but I'm feeling a little tired. If you'll excuse me…" She walks away, climbing down into the hold. Below, she looks around. There is light and movement from the room at the end of the narrow hallway. She heads that way. Inside, the crew is eating, playing cards, and being rowdy. Miri smiles to herself. She walks up to the card players. "Mind if I join?" They look at each other. "Sure, miss…" "Miri." she says. "I'm a little rusty, but I've played once or twice at parties!" They deal her in. Maude and Deimos are still talking as they head below. "So doc, where you from?" "Little town called Rattan. Kind of the middle of nowhere. You?" "Family's in Khoban! Well… my wife is. The kids are both in Leerain already, off doin' who knows what." They enter the galley. Miri glances at the other card players, then shows her hand. The players stare, mouths agape, as she pulls the pile of coins towards her. "Thanks for the game, gentlemen!" Maude and Deimos raise their eyebrows at each other. The card players get up, and Maude and Deimos take their seats. "Nicely done!" Deimos says. "Thanks." Miri cracks her knuckles. Maude sweats slightly, but smiles. Maude, Deimos and Miri chat. Cut to panels of Miri arm-wrestling crew members, Maude talking and laughing with Ballio (his leg in a cast and propped up on a barrel), and Deimos drinking with friends. Next page It's evening, and Marcus sights land. The ship pulls into the docks. Miri rushes to the rail. "Is this it? Leerain?" Marcus: "No. These are the Spitfire Islands. We're resupplying before we set out again." The crew and passengers begin to disembark as the captain watches. "We ship out with the tide tomorrow!" she shouts. "Anyone without a place to stay in town is welcome to stay on board, provided they keep their behavior under control." "That means no drinking or carousing!" Marcus adds. "Ah, come on, Marcus!" Deimos yells over his shoulder. Marcus glares. "Anything I should see while I'm here?" Miri asks the captain. "The tavern, obviously!" Deimos interrupts before she can answer. Maude rolls her eyes, but smiles. "Just don't give Marcus anything else to yell at you for, alright?" she says. Deimos says "psssh" and rolls his eyes. Miri, Maude and Deimos head out into the town. It's small and ramshackle, with few buildings and dirt roads. There are no horses or animals besides a chicken and a stray dog, which watch them pass. A man bumps into Miri. They get entangled for moment, before she pushes him backwards. It's a young human, with dark hair and simple clothes. "Ssorry, miss!" he slurrs, obviously drunk. He looks her up and down. "You're… fancy!" Miri's lip curls. She pushes past him and keeps walking. Maude and Deimos follow. "Hope you haaave a good night!" the kid yells after them. The group enters the tavern as the sun sets. It's dark "A round here, please!" Deimos waves across the room as they sit down. The beers arrive. Maude and Miri sip them cautiously. "So, Miri, right?" Deimos says. "Yep. And you're…" "Deimos Cantamere! Sailor, miner, ex-soldier -- you name it, I've probably done it." "Plus, he's the ship's best liar," Maude fake-whispers to Miri. "I'm hurt that you'd doubt my experience, Heron!" Deimos says, hand on his chest in mock horror. "Kids these days -- no respect." He frowns. "Come to think of it, how old are you both?" Maude and Miri answer in unison: "22." Deimos' eyes bulge a little. He looks at Miri. "22? And they let you join the guild??" Miri shrugs. "I'm a quick learner." "And you're supposed to be a doctor?" Deimos asks incredulously, gesturing to Maude. She rolls her eyes to the side. "Yyyep. Why? Any complaints about that first aid you got? I seem to recall one of us thought it'd be a good idea to cut a tangled net with a rusty longsword, and I don't think it was me or Miri." Miri stifles a snort. "Snnrk." Deimos glares for a moment, then bursts out laughing. "Got me there, Cass." He ruffles her hair. They finish their drinks and stand up, then leave and walk out onto the dark street. They walk back to the ship, with Deimos starting to say "When I was your age…." They're about to set foot on the gangplank when Miri stops dead. "Wait." The other two stop, halfway up the walkway. "My purse is gone." Miri says. This conversation is all one image: "Are you sure?" Maude asks. "Yes." "How much was in it?" Deimos asks. "All of my money." "Do you know when you lost it?" Maude asks. "No, I…." Next image: Miri's eyes narrow. "Yes, actually, I think I do." She turns around. "Come on. You two are gonna help me get it back." Deimos and Maude look at each other, both with eyebrow raised. They shrug in unison, and follow Miri back into the night.